It was family dinner night yesterday. So we loaded up the kids in the salt and dirt covered car and headed off to the restaurant that was finally decided on, after an hour of deliberation. My husband got in the passenger seat and we proceeded down the road to our destination.
I noticed (because of his obnoxiously loud chewing) that he had a piece of gum in his mouth. I hadn’t had time to brush my teeth before we left and was feeling a tad fuzzy and in need of freshening up myself. So I asked him, “Do you have anymore gum?”
He replied, “Yes, but why do you need gum? You’re going to be eating in like ten minutes.”
“I don’t care, I didn’t get a chance to brush my teeth and my mouth feels gross.”
Again, he replied, “But we’re gonna be at the restaurant in like ten minutes.”
“Just give me a damn piece of gum!”
On a whine, as he reached into his pocket. “I don’t have that much left.”
Rolling my eyes, “Forget it. I don’t want a piece of your precious gum!”
Still digging in his pocket, “I just don’t see why you need a piece now, when we’re going to be eating.”
Hands clenching the wheel, arms stiff, “Don’t worry about it. I don’t want your damn gum.”
Finally finding a piece and reaching over to give it to me, “I just don’t get why you need a piece if we are going to be eating in like ten minutes.”
(Keep in mind; he’s still chewing HIS gum)
Eyes forward, driving “Get the gum out of my face. I don’t want it.”
Still trying to shove the gum in my face, “Really, why do you need a piece now?”
“Get it out of my face before I throw it out of the window!”
Putting the gum back in his pocket, “I just don’t understand why you need a piece of gum right now, when you’ll just spit it out in like ten minutes.”
“Seriously, you’ll just spit it out, right?”
“Well you would. You’d chew it for five minutes and then spit it out.”
Eye roll. Silence, with an internal sigh.
Today, I’m buying my own pack of gum.